Looking back at 2005

Here's a sorta quick (ok, it's not quick ... it's sort of ... very detailed) overview of my 2005.
** there are links to pictures for certain events

JANUARY 2005

• Celebrated New Year's eve at Abao with our paputok. After eating at home, we went to Ate Kaye's place to also celebrate the eve with them. (pics)
• The reunion was at Abao. A lot of our relatives went there and of course, we had our traditional get-together-inuman.
• Went to Tagaytay with family.
• Venue hunting with Penny and Mang Jack for the ASD Management Training.
• Saw eTel friends coz of a birthday celebration. I drove to Commonwealth (with Tin, Mike, & Neil) to go to Nin's house to celebrate! (pic of Markie & Nin)
• Went to Subic for the ASD Training that was put together by OPMC Trainers (Penny, me & Berlin), and was conducted by 2 guest speakers (pics).
• Gabby & Tricia's birthday celebration (pics) - It was fun! I was able to play with plastic baloons again! Nagpalayok! Nagrelay! It was fun!! and the best part is I got to be with my cousins!!

FEBRUARY 2005

• Feb 13 ... Brought Tita Aida & Tito Ben to Subic. (pics)
• Feb 14 ... Valentine's Day!
• Feb 18 ... first ever (Philippines) MTV HipHop Awards & I was there!
• Feb 19 ... my birthday!! Lucky me coz that was a Saturday so most people had their day offs. I had a "small" gathering at my house. I only invited my close friends so I wasn't expecting a lot of people there. Later on that night, we needed to get more chairs coz some of my guests were already standing up. The people who went: My relatives (can't enumerate this, but around 30+ relatives) plus ... Terence dT, Penny R, Wal C, Berlin M, Joema M, Lauren B, Joyce P, Alex A, Cathy B, Kitin B, Cla M, Anna Marie B, Josette S, Angela H, Arvy M, Zein A, Karen Q, Kench dV, AJ G, Al B, Melvin C, Dana, JF V, . I got a pretty decent number of people drunk ... congrats to me!! hehe. At the end of the night ... I was so dead tired that I almost slept during the "drinking session" with my cousins.

MARCH 2005

• My 2nd time to Puerto Galera ... the place of all evil. haha.
• March 12 was a gimik with the WHOLE marketing department of OPMC. Yep that includes my boss!! Cool. hehe.
• I went out with Cathy and Cla ... two of my best buds back in highschool. We went to Fridays then to Starbucks. Then a bright idea struck us ... we made a note to each other to be kept forever. I still have mine with me!
• My sorta last gimik to Greenbelt (March 19). I went out with my college friends and Ate Kaye. We even took a picture in the bathroom. That night I also saw David & KY
• My cousins from Laguna went to my house to say goodbye coz "the day" is coming. (pics)
• Last carwash with Ate Kaye at Tazza/Genki along Banawe (pics) ... **sniff*sniff**
• Ang huling inuman with cousins (pics). Kakasad grabe ang night na yun. I shed so much tears. I hugged my cousins before the left. Hohum.
• March 23 ... ang araw ng flight. The stop over was at Taipei. Grabe, malinis ang lugar nila.
• My mom had her birthday at Mira Mesa. It was also Easter nung time na un, and also my grandpa's birthday (dad's side).
• I really liked my room in Escondido.
• The initial plan was for the family to go to San Diego Zoo but we ended up going to the SanDiego Wild Animal Park. JC and I got swarmed by birds when we had the nectar thingy. Also, we saw some majestic lions ... cool.
• He told me that break kami coz of the set-up coz malayo, etc. and he said na para daw I don't get held back and could go out with people.

APRIL 2005

• Tita Bel picked us up and we went to an outlet near Carlsbad. Then we stayed at this hotel in Carlsbad and we saw the flower beds ... awesome! (pic)
• Tita Prosie and Tito Willie brought us to Mt. Soledad and near this beautiful (yet rocky) shore which is actually called Cabrillo.
• We also went to Ferry Landing & Colorodo Beach.
• We had one of our MANY moves from Tita Bel's place to Tita Sandra's place. (pics)
• We went to Disneyland and Universal Studios with Tita Sandra & Tito Carlos.
• We also went to Tita Joyce's place. She's the sister of my godmother (Tita Sandra). They have this super cute dog but I kinda feel bad for him coz he's blind.
• April 13, we arrived in New York and Tito Dan picked us up then brought us to Tita Nerissa's home in New Jersey. The following day, Tita Nerissa gave us a tour of the city. Then on the 15th, Tita Nimia, Tito Rod & Keith picked us up at Tita Nerissa's and brought us to Ellis Island & the Statue of Liberty. Later on that night, we met more of my mom's highschool batchmates at the reunion at Tata Bino's in Queens.
• The night of April 17, Tito Jun picked us up and we went to Maryland. We went to this botanical place in Washington (I think). There was also this big church that we went to, then for dinner ... we went to Hyatt Hotel ... sossy! (pics)
• He said that he can't live without me and that he can't imagine my life without me so he wanted to get back together. Pumayag naman ako ... tsk tsk.

MAY 2005

• I had a mega big fight with someone. This was the 2nd time I was really mad. First was a Saturday last April 2004. Those are the rare moments I really scream at someone and lose all my patience. FYI, super patient ako so I rarely get super mad ... so when I get super mad at you ... (un)lucky you!
• May 3, my mom and brothers left for the Philippines. This was one of those rare occasions that my brothers and I cry together. I was so touched coz my brothers were really crying and I really felt that they were concerned and worried about me. **singit: naiiyak ako while thinking of that moment at the airport in L.A.**
• I went to Ida's birthday and met some people. As usual, I was quiet. I only got "talkative" when I had some alcohol. haha the power of intoxication. (pics)
• Anna and I went out occasionally to have our "bonding moments".
• Hooka night with Ellen, Ashley, Enzo, Mark, & their 2 other friends (oh my gosh, sorry, I forgot the names!)
• I moved to New York (for good) ... I think that was May 15. At first I stayed with Tito Dan in Queens then I moved to Tita Cha's place.
• I called him to greet him for the monthseri ... he broke up with me coz according to him, I'm making his life more difficult and that I don't "try" to understand him. I was so tired of having the break up-make up routine. It was like a roller coaster coz I didn't know "where" we are and I don't hear from him often.

JUNE 2005

• He asked me back and said that he'll make it up to me. I believed him (stupid me, tsk tsk).
• We went up to MA to check Marc's school. (pics)
• Ate Marites, Kuya Mon and cutie Zac went to NY so we met up with them. (pics)
• For father's day ... we went to Atlantic City.
• I went to Marc & Keith's grad party. Keith's ex and I were buddies at the party. hehe. She was fun to talk to, di po ako nagpapakaplastic. Tunay pong she was fun to talk to at the party.
• I started work. It was good ... pretty much like my first job. The people were nice, but I don't talk much to my co-workers so ... there's the problem, my shyness.

JULY 2005

• My love life went crazy these past months. I don't want to elaborate on this but bottom line is ... we broke up. (a lot of people congratulated me on this decision, hmm)
• I had some time alone ... just for myself ... which is good. I did a lot of things ... laundry, fixed my room, etc. I also opened up my "baul" and started reminiscing ... I saw my lola's letter for me. As expected, I cried.
• My first July 4! We watched the fireworks from Mercy College.
• I heard a shocking news that someone died ... ¤=( Though I don't know her, my cousin talks to her ... so yeah, it's shocking. ¤=(
• I had my first ever Hooters courtesy of Marc!
• Went to a picnic at Mountainside ... it was a super awesome place.

AUGUST 2005

• My first Bubbagump in NY! Though it's expensive ... I enjoyed it. I savored every single bite. hehe.
• It's when "Teapot" really talked to me. ewwwww. FYI: Teapot is the guy at the bus stop who tried to make a move on me. And I called him Teapot because he's short & stout. haha.
• Tiffany went to NY so we gave her a tour. Actually, it was like Keith was the one giving both of us a tour. (pics) Miss you Tiff!
• The Pangilinans went to Delaware so I had the whole house to myself for one week. It was fun!! hehe. That was the first official month that I cooked food. Yahoo!
• I think this was when I started getting "Friends" crazy.

SEPTEMBER 2005

• My lola started using oxygen tank which proved that her condition was becoming more and more serious.
• I finished reading the "Da Vinci Code". It was nice!! It's one of them books that I can't put down.
• I met up with Tita Melda at Toys R Us at Time Square ... it was nice to see family!
• The original plan was for me to go home in December, but My lola was terribly sick so I went home. I left JFK Airport on Sept 22 (NY), I arrived at NAIA on Sept 24 (Manila). When I first saw my lola, I cried coz she looked like she was in so much pain. Later on that day, she woke up and she was able to recognize me. She even pulled me to her and kissed me. **singit: naiiyak na naman ako! Accdg to my relatives, ako lang ang ginanun niya. I miss my lola!! ¤=( **
• Sept 25 ... My lola passed away. It was a very sad day. While the nurses were arranging stuff, my cousins and I went down and just hung out at the lobby of the hospital. We were reminscing the good times with her and the things that we are gonna miss about her.
• Sept 26, my lola was at Sto. Domingo. Then we transferred her to Lourdes Church for the rest of the week. During these times, I saw a lot of my relatives which made me happy but the circumstance wasn't that "desirable". (cousin pic) Some of my friends also dropped by ... Cathy, Cla and Nap.

OCTOBER 2005

• Before having the ceremonies/mass at the church, we had the last picture taking with Mommy. There's this pamahiin kasi na bawal bumalik or lumingon so we had to do everything na. When we moved her to the church, we had the mass. While Jo (our psychic friend) was videotaping the whole thing, she was also seeing "sprits" ... one of which was my lola. At the end of the ceremony at the church, she said my lola was waving and sending out flying kisses to everyone there. **singit: naiiyak ako pag naiimagine ko si mommy, like now** We then went to Loyola for the libing. (pics1 pics2)
• Since I'm at Pinas na, I met up with some of my friends. I went clubbing, went to different restaurants, fast food places, & shempre ... malls!
• My cousins, brothers (and the gfs) and I went to Enchanted Kingdom in Laguna. It was fun!
• Oct 13 ... I had to go back to NY. My mom brought me to the airport. It was weird being alone in the airport. Tas I had a very bad katabi on the plane. Super bad! She was "hogging" all the space, what's worse is she can't understand/talk in English ... so I can't tell her to move or something.
  

NOVEMBER 2005

• My family went to Loyola to visit my lola ... inggit ako. I called them though while they were there.
• Keith & I went clubbing sa NYC (People to be specific) with his college friends. (pics)
• My first thanksgiving. I wasn't in the mood coz I miss my family. When we were at Tita Nimia's aunt's place ... I ended up going home earlier than expected coz I ended up crying a lot. Seeing them together made me more homesick.
• I got in touch with Elaine ... my cousin in Australia. It's so cool that we get to talk again!
• When we went to UMass, I saw snow! That's the first official sighting of snow. hehe.
  I completed my "Friends" Collection!! All 10 seasons!!

DECEMBER 2005

• Keith brought me to Rockefeller and I saw a pretty light show! The tree was nice, I sorta wanted to skate but then I realized if I fall down ... a lot of people will see me since it's an open space .. so NOOOO!! So we just went to Hooters after that. When we got out of Hooters, it was already so cold.
• Joyce (my boss) took us out for dinner. (pics)
• Dec 17 ... I had my first haircut sa US. Pucha! Ang mahal!! Anyway ... we also went to Keith's office party. His officemates were really nice. I (surprisingly) talked to people. hehe.
• Dec 21 ... We had a luncheon at work. There was a lot of food. I do mean a lot. hahaha.
• We went to PJ's house for his going away party. I met some of Keith's other friends but then again ... di na naman ako nagsalita. I just ate and drank.
• I talked to my family until 1 AM last Christmas coz I miss them so much. I sent lechon to them na naging ugat ng discussion coz the place I ordered it from didn't include my name. After talking to my family, shempre I slept then when I woke up, nagbukas kami gifts.
• Christmas day ... morning we went to mass, took pictures with the tree, then ... afternoon we went to the reunion at a hall near the house.
• I've been browsing through a lot of blogs, profiles, web pages, etc .... I found out a lot of things (sorry to the people whose stuff i snooped ... i'm curious aka nosey, hehe) which made me feel so lucky in my relationship with Keith. I saw blogs that proved the lying and hiding of a lot of things that was done to me in the past. It actually makes me wanna talk to *** and **** to verify things but doing that won't really be helpful to me. It'll make me hate someone and hatred is something I don't want to have now. I have enough stuff to think about.
• Dec 31 ... It's the last day of 2005 and it's freaking snowing!! It's cool to see snow but I don't like it being too cold.

If I had to describe my 2005 in word ... it's a "rollercoaster". I've had a fair share of ups and downs ... enough to make me realize that God didn't forget me. He's really wise in giving the challenges and blessings to each. I realized that my family is the most important thing in the whole world. I also found the one who will not make me cry and will not hurt me. I learned that it is never right to "settle" for someone or something ... there's always that "one" that is meant for us.

I'm pretty sure that 2006 will hold more surprises and harder problems but I know that my loved ones will always be with me to face all those.

So 2006 ... "Do your worst, for I will do mine" --Count of Monte Cristo

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First Christmas in New York

It was my first Christmas away from home. Since I wasn't with them ... I thought it would be a good surprise to send them something, so I ordered lechon online and had it sent to them at a specific time. So ... there I was chatting with them on Christmas morning (Christmas Eve here in NY) and I felt bad coz no one was saying thank you. When I asked what they were having for the gathering, they mentioned the lechon and that it was a gift from someone. Little did I know the place I ordered from was stupid and didn't include my name when they sent the lechon. haha. So anyway, I told them it was from me and then they told me they've been guessing who it came from since that morning. I talked to almost everyone there until around 1 AM here (2 pm in Manila). It was good to hear their voices. It let me sleep well.

When I woke up, it was time to open gifts at the Pangilinan Residence (it's where I live). After Tita Nimia distributed the gifts ...

... to us ...

... we opened them!
.

After breakfast, we went to mass then took some pictures with the tree.


The grand reunion was held at the Ardsley Hall (which was like 5 minutes away from the house, yipee!). The place was nice. We set up the tables and some decorations then slowly, their relatives came. We had a nice meal ...

... and there were some performances ...

... and of course the Yankee Swap ...
.

All in all it was a fun day ... I got to talk to my family back home and made them happy with my little gift. Plus, I got to eat a lot of food, laugh a lot, got some nice gifts and talk to people.

Psychological Movies

I love Psychological Movies. As in really really love them. I dunno if it's because I took up psychology or it is because they are just really good. But I really really love them. Not only does it make me think and analyze the situation, it gives me more information about a person's psyche. Plus, there's always that "Aaaahh!! That's what happened!! That's the reason why all that stuff happened!!" at the end of the movie.

I think, from now on I'm gonna make that one of my hobbies ... to collect Psychological Thrillers. I already started with Identity. Hmmm ... I wonder what's next?

Some thoughts on "Imitation of Life"

"Imitation of Life" is a movie from 1959. When Marsha lent me the DVD, I was hesitant to watch it coz it's OLD! It started pretty slow but the movie picked up later on. Though I didn't like the ending that much coz it was kinda bitin ... but it made me cry.

Gist: Annie (a black lady) met Lora (an aspiring white actress) on the beach. Since Annie and her daughter Sarah Jane (who has white skin and tries to hide/deny the fact that she has black roots) had nowhere to stay at, Lora offered her home for the night. Since then, Annie and Sarah Jane stayed with Lora and her daughter Susie. When Laura's career picked up, she started giving Susie the best things in life but since she was always busy, she was never there to be a real mother. Susie of course always went to Annie when she needed anything. Meanwhile, Sarah Jane went off somewhere to be "white" so she asked her mother to stay away from her. Little did she know, her mom is dying. After Susie and Lora settled their issue on Lora not being available, the tragedy happened. Annie was on her deathbed and she was leaving all sorts of reminders to Lora and Steve (Lora's boyfriend who she broke up with 10-15 yrs ago but when then they met again ... they settled their issues/differences and got engaged). On the march going to the cemetery, Sarah Jane came running to her mother's coffin. She was crying out "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it!! I killed my mother!! I should've stayed!!" The end.

So anyway ... some thoughts / obvious lessons from the movie ...

• Never take anyone for granted. Don't let death make you realize a person's worth.
• Accept who you are and be proud of it. In the case that you are not happy with who you are, do something to change your future but never deny what you were in the past. Ika nga nila "Ang di marunong lumingon sa pinangagalingan ay di makakarating sa paroroonan"
• It is right that to have goals/dreams, but that shouldn't be the one dictating how we run our lives. Our goals/dreams should just be a guiding force that will give us direction, it shouldn't define who we are. Someone once told me that we should "Work to Live, not Live to Work."
• If love is true/sincere/real, even if it is put on hold for years ... it will still happen. If it's meant to happen, it will happen. Ika nga nila "Kung kayo talaga, magiging kayo ... di man ngayon, pero balang araw."
• Lying/Hiding things will never have a positive outcome. Sure ... it may be good for now, but since "Walang sikretong hindi nabubunyag", the truth will haunt eventually.
• Family is the most important thing ... make it your priority. Coz if you don't you'll regret it.

update

This week has been really slow at work. I think I've gone to every website I can think of, and I've checked people's profile at least once ... and my close friends at least 3x.
What I've learned: It's sorta ironically funny how things turn out.

Last Saturday morning (night in the Philippines), I called my family. It was my late grandma's birthday so they had a gathering to celebrate her birthday plus it was also RC's birthday. **singit: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ATE KAYE (Dec 15), and RC & MOMMY (Dec 17) ** My cousins were having the traditional drinking session while the "grown-ups" were having a discussion. I think I was able to talk to them for around 20-30 minutes and I was ok for only 3-5 minutes coz the rest of the time ... I was crying. I was able to talk to my mom, my grandpa, JC, Tita Lu, Tita Les, RC, Kuya Jerms, Kuya RJ, Tricia, Nicole, AJ and Gabby.
What I've learned: I thought I was already "strong", but upon hearing their voices, I break down. I cry almost instantly.

Later on that day, I went to the "parlor" and had a haircut. Tita Nimia said it was $25, though I thought it was expensive, I decided to just get it coz I don't get a haircut often. The hair stylist told me what he's gonna do then the whole works was done. When it was time to pay, the bill was given to me and my jaw dropped. I was speechless. The bill was $40. Gusto kong sumigaw ng "PUCHA!! ANG MAHAL!!" but of course, I didn't want to make a scene. I wanted to ask why but all that came out of my mouth was "$40? ..." then my voice trailed off as I handed him the payment.
What I've learned: Dapat akong matuto maggupit ng sariling buhok para di na ko magbabayad sa parlor. hahaha. As if naman!!

That night, we went to Keith's office party. It was nice. His officemates are really fun to talk to. I may have not talked much (kumpara sa kapag comfy na ko sobra) but I did talk to them more than I talk to my "other" officemates. "Other" kasi there are some people in the office that I really talk to and tell stories with, but there's a lot na nde. So anyway, I just want to say that Keith's officemates were really nice to me and I'm happy that I met them.
What I've learned: I am capable of talking to "new" people ... Di ako dapat matakot sa office ko!

Sunday ... we went to mass then went to Queens to eat at a Filipino Resto called "Ihawan". It was really yummy. I had lengua ... it was good, but nothing beats my grandma's Lengua.
What I've learned: No matter how close some things are, nothing beats the original.

Here are some pix of my "new hair" that's not so new. I've had a similar haircut before. But since it was so freaking expensive, I'll just think of it as the best haircut in the whole wide world para I won't feel too bad spending on it. hahaha. (alam kong mataba na ko ... haha. keber!)

it sucks to be paranoid or too imaginative. The imagination can concur the wildest scene with just a minor stupid detail. The worst part is, there's actually nothing to be scared of ... but that doesn't change the fact the fear and paranoia is still there. The only thing left to do is to make sure the heart & mind will get rid of the fear, and replace it with trust ... then everything is back to normal. Everything is where it is suppose to be.

survey for the day

1.Ever been given a ring?
** yep

2. Longest Relationship with a friend:
** with a friend? well, i'm still in touch with my friends

3. Last gift you received:
** i dunno ... can't remember

4. How many times have you dropped cell today?
** 0

5. Last sport you played?
** would ice skating count? if yeah, almost a month ago.

6. Things you spend a lot of money on?
** plane ticket!! food!! coat!! clothes!! boots!! shoes!!

7. Three things you ate last?
** whopper, onion rings, fries

8. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
** eyes

9. One favorite song:
** stick with you

10. Where do you live?
** new york

11. High school you attend(ed):
** STC QC PH

12. Cell phone service provider:
** cingular

13. Favorite mall store:
** palisades

14. Longest Job held:
** trainer at OPMC

15. Do you own a pair of dice?
** nope

16. Do you prank call people?
** nope

17. Last wedding attend?
** my cousin's wedding. ate king & kuya peewee

18. First friend you'd call if you won the lottery?
** friend? Kat.

19 Favorite fast food restaurant:
** mcdo

21. Biggest lie you have heard?
** hay naku. don't get me started with this topic.

22. Immediate Vacation Spot:
** dunno.

23. Where's your favorite place to eat with friends:
** sa pinas ... grill places (dencios, gerrys, etc).

24. Can you cook?
** i can!

25. What car do you drive?
** right now i don't drive. but the car i drove before, honda civic VTIS

26. Best kisser?
** ano ber ... tanungin daw ba.

27. Last time you cried?
** can't remember

28. Most hated food:
** tasteless/bland food, chaka pala ampalaya

29. Things you like most about yourself:
** i'm patient and understanding.

30. Thing you hate most about yourself:
** too shy, insecure?

31. Person you want to do in a bad way?
** you mean like ... gusto kong gawan ng masama? uhm ... can't think of anyone.

32. Longest shift you have worked at a job?
** 13 hrs

33. Favorite Movie/s?
** sobrang dami eh

34. Can you sing?
** yeah i can sing ... it doesn't sound good though

35. Last concert attended?
** i dunno ... can't remember

37. Last movie rented:
** can't remember

38. Favorite Alcoholic drink?
** vodka ice, smirnoff ice, vodka w/ sprite

39. Things you never leave home without:
** cell, money, card, bus pass

40. What are you gonna do now that your done?
** go back to work. hehe

my present craving

Things I want to eat:

• my lola's lengua ... *sniff*sniff* I'll never have this again ¤=(
• my mom's Beef Casserole w/ mushroom and corn (I'll try cooking this one of these days)
• my lolo's Beef Steak
• Ate Kaye's white sauce pasta (I was able to cook this 4 or 5 months ago! Yey!)
• Tito Albert's Dinuguan
• Tita Lu's Baked Macaroni
• my fried rice mala ulam (coz it's so rich with sahog kaya parang may ulam na!)
• Lola Curing's Leche Flan
• Lola Emen's Papaitan
• sausage that I tasted from a year or 2 ago
• isaw!!
• Sinigang na Baboy
• Nilagang Baka
• Jack's Loft's Beef Stroganoff
• Jollibee's Jolly Hotdog
• Pansit Malabon's Palabok
• Hooters' 911 Wings
• Dominos Pizza
• Stew Leonards' Caesar Salad
• Bubbagump's Popcorn Shrimp
• Friday's Cajun Chicken Fingers
• Brazo de Mercedes

Things I want to do:

• spend the holidays with my family (duh)
• take my family out ... either watch a movie or just eat out or just shopping
• cuddle while watching movies
• go shopping
• watch a LOT of movies and TV shows
• sleep
• eat (the stuff i listed above ... not at the same time though)
• snowboarding
• study again (though I don't know what I'll study ... take nursing? or go to grad school?)
• go home and rest ... but still get paid (that's the life!!)

Those are the only things I can think of at the moment. Heehee.

words to ponder on ...

"you were easy in the Philippines" ... wow.

monday at work

My boss is having too much fun with me. haha. First, she's complimented me ... "Ninna, you had a pretty big ad". Then I told her ... "There's actually two of them". She says "Wow, that's good". Then she questions me "But where are my attractors?". I shrug my shoulder and say "I don't know" (BTW, attractors are this thing we put on the ad to make it more expensive ... but I don't put it as much now as I did before) Then comes the insult "C'mon Ninna, give me attractors. you lazy." I was like ... "whaaaaaaat!?!?!" I just laughed. hehe. Then after like an hour, she was speaking out loud that I only got 5 service directory ads (these are more expensive ads) and are just 2"x2". Rachel (her assistant) was saying "Don't mind her. She's just picking on you".

I just laughed at them. She was trying to joke around ... I'm the only one she can joke with coz others take her jokes seriously. Though of course, I won't push her "over the edge" ... I'm still a good employee. I generate revenue and I do my work ... most of the time. haha

chatting in the office

be careful when you chat in the office. actually, even when you're typing an email or surfing on the net ... just be careful whenever you're in the office or any public place.

i just got someone in trouble coz of that. always check what you're typing and who's around you or the person you're sending the message to.

waaaaaaaah!! i feel so bad!! so embarassed!!! pucha!!

coffee morning

This morning, I decided to get coffee and bagel for breakfast. I was thinking that the coffee would keep me awake. As I was drinking it, I realized ... "wow, I make good coffee." OK ... fine, I had the right mix of coffed and milk and sugar. heehee. Anyway, after drinking it ... instead of it making me feel more awake, it made me sleepy. As in I was really falling asleep! Crazy coffee ... it has an opposite effect on me.

I just talked to mahal. He is stuck in traffic coz he had to get gas and food. Supposedly, he just needs to get the food for lunch but his mom didn't leave any gas so he spent almost 20 minutes getting the gas. He just got on the highway and there's traffic. I hope he gets to the office safely.

I also kinda feel bad coz I don't get to chat with my mom, brothers and cousins anymore. I'm always out ... either at the gym or mall or something. I miss my family. I try to forget that Christmas is coming coz if I dwell too much on it, I might end up crying. huhuhu.

Now, all that's left to do is make the best out of everything. ¤=)

mistakes in the past

There are some things that can't be changed by anything. No matter how sincerely sorry you are for the things that happened, it will still haunt you. No matter what you do to make up for the wrong choices you make, it won't change the fact that you made the mistake.

Though I wouldn't be here now if weren't for the past, there are things that I still would've done differently. Since I've learned from my mistakes in the past, I'm sure not to do them again.

To the people I've hurt ... I'm sorry. I really am. The past can't be changed, but I'm sure the future holds hope for everyone. Let's make the most out of it. Make your choices count so that the future would be favorable.

christmas survey

Sa tingin mo, ilang days na lang bago mag-Pasko?
-- 16

Ano ang feeling mo at malapit na ang Pasko?
-- sad coz malayo sa family, but excited coz new experience

Sino nasa Christmas gift list mo ngayon?
-- ala mashado coz malayo ako sa mga nireregaluhan ko regularly

May natanggal ba sa Christmas gift list mo?
-- di naman natanggal, postponed lang coz di ko rin naman mabibigay kahit meron

Define Christmas in 5 or less words
-- enjoying family and celebrating blessings

What do you expect pag nag-December na?
-- family reunions!! ¤=( sale!!! ¤=)

May decor na ba yung bahay nyo?
-- yep

Naniniwala ka ba kay Santa?
-- dati

Kabisado mo ba yung names ng reindeers ni Santa?
-- nope!

Kabisado mo ba yung gifts sa kantang 12 days of Christmas?
-- nope

Nag-Christmas shopping ka na ba?
-- nope

Ano gusto mong matanggap this Christmas?
-- plane ticket papuntang pinas! or movie of my family! or pea coat or long coat na professional ang dating! or winter boots na good for snow!! or meteor garden season dvd 1 & 2 with the original language and english subtitle! sex and the city dvd of all seasons! sony dsc-t7!! new laptop!

Anong ayaw mong matanggap?
-- picture frame, scented candle, lotion, cheapeeps na perfume/cologne, face towels

Kuripot ka ba when it comes to gift-giving?
-- it depends on my budget and the gift i gave before that occasion

May nagca-caroling na ba sa inyo?
-- ala ako naririnig

Nangangaroling ka ba pag December?
-- nung bata ako

Ever experienced snow?
-- yeah ... right now. leche.

Kelan mo naramdaman ang Christmas spirit?
-- pag nagshoshopping na, then when we put up the tree, and pag time na for the reunions

Dec. 25 to you means...
-- reunion with family ... well, not for this year though.

Fave foods pag Christmas
-- lengua ni mommy!! papaitan ni lola curing!! sinampalukan kila lola emen sa nueva ecija!!
lumpia!! lechon!! baked fish, barbeque, kare kare,

Have you been naughty or nice this year?
-- tried to be nice

Line mo pag manghihingi ng aginaldo...
-- hi ninang/ninong! merry christmas!!

Dream place mo for celebrating Christmas?
-- abao ¤=)

Who do you want to be with this Christmas?
-- my family, keith and friends

Christmas wish?
---- for everything to fall in its right place

bad dreams

I dunno why ... but i'm back to my "old sleeping habit". It's where I wake up in the middle of the night ... sometime between 1-3 AM ... then it would usually take me an hour before I can sleep again. To make the matters worse, I had super bad nightmares. I dreamt that he was sneaking his ex into the house in the middle of the night then makes sure that she's gone by morning so that no one would find out that they've been having an affair. But the worst nightmare that happened last night was when my family died (*knock on wood*). I woke up crying coz of that nightmare. I thought it was over, but when I went back to sleep, the story in the nightmare continued. It was like a movie I can't control ... all I could do was watch and cry.

When my alarm went off, I felt so heavy. I was so scared that the nightmare might come true. I hope it doesn't.

Harry Potter: Goblet of Fire

I just got home ... fresh from the theater. I watched HP4: Goblet of Fire in White Plains, NY after having a great meal at Zanaro's.

The movie was awesome. Viktor Krum (Stanislav Ianevski) was hot! Cedric (Robert Pattinson) was a cutie! Hermione (Emma Watson) was so gorgeous!! Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) was ... well ... all grown up! Ron (Rupert Grint) was still Ron. hehehe. Anyway, the storyline was great, the way the had everything set-up was great!! Also, I love the fact that the movie actually featured different ethnicities. It's so cool! Cho Chang (Katie Leung) was really pretty!!

Well ... my eyes are soooooooo tired. I've staring at a screen (computer/movie) for over 15 hrs. I need rest so ... bye!!